Today’s Reading: Numbers 20–22, Psalm 119

Do I trust in my own leadership or in the God who led me to this moment?

When God’s people camped at Kadesh, there was no water and they began to rebel against Moses and Aaron once again. They blamed the leaders for their discomfort and circumstances. Without water, there would be no grain, no grapes, no pomegranates, and obviously nothing to drink. Moses and Aaron had just buried their sister, Miriam, and now their leadership role was requiring them to deal with the complaints of the people. The brothers fell face down before the Lord with this new problem and God gave them clear instructions, just as He is generously in the habit of doing for us.

“You and Aaron must take the staff and assemble the entire community. As the people watch, speak to the rock over there, and it will pour out its water. You will provide enough water from the rock to satisfy the entire community and their livestock.” – Numbers 20:8

Moses took his staff of leadership with the intent of following God’s instructions but, when the moment came for him to act on his leadership, Moses trusted in his staff more than He relied on His God. He was to speak to the rock and he instead struck the rock. Water poured forth and the needs were supplied, but not in the way God had instructed Moses. Moses found himself relying on the strength of his own leadership instead of God’s miraculous power, and the consequence was great.

“Because you did not trust me enough to demonstrate my holiness to the people of Israel, you will not lead them into the land I am giving them!” – Numbers 20:12

The second consequence was just as great. Because they did not follow God’s instructions regarding the water at Meribah, it was time for Aaron to join their ancestors in death. So Moses climbed Mount Hor with Aaron and his nephew, Eleazar. At the summit, he removed the priestly garments from Aaron and placed them on Eleazar. Then Aaron died on the mountain and all of Israel mourned for him for 30 days (20:22-29).

Am I focused on my own plan or listening for God’s plan?

Balaam was so focused on his own plan, what he thought he should do, that he was both blind and deaf to God’s attempts to block his plan.

God’s response through his angel (22:32-33): “Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to OPPOSE you because your path is a reckless one before me. The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If she had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared her.”

Once God had his attention, Balaam’s response was one of repentance and obedience (v.34): “I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back.”

We live in a world of smartphones, smart tvs and smart cars. If we need an answer to a question, we ask Siri. If we need directions, we go to Google Maps. If we want to hear a song, we ask Alexa. Our exercise bike became a Peloton with online trainers, and we do more talking on social media than we do face to face. But has our culture become so “smart” that we have stopped following God’s word and stopped hearing His voice?

So again I ask — do I trust in my own leadership or in the God who led me to this moment? Am I focused on my own plan or listening for God’s plan? Am I pushing after what I want instead of listening for God’s instruction? I want to respond as Balaam did. I want to be the one who has a heart of repentance and is willing to go with God’s plan the moment I realize that I am doing my own thing instead of following the Lord. I want to be smarter than my mode of transportation.

Thank you for the reminder, Lord, to live in faith and not fear. Please show me if at any moment today I am trusting more in myself than in You. Quiet the distractions and circumstances in my life so that I can better listen for your clear instructions and your plan. My desire is for your way and not mine. I love you, Lord. Amen.

I told you my plans, and you answered. Now teach me your decrees. Help me understand the meaning of your commandments, and I will meditate on your wonderful deeds. — Psalm 119:26–27